The Clash Cut The Crap Reviewed
6 NOV 2022
After a three year gap we finally get the new Clash album, but loads had happened in between. Mick and Topper had been fired and Strummer had recruited some young guns in the form of Vince White, Nick Shepherd and Pete Howard. 80’s pop was in full swing, Gorgeous George the chap who had stood next to me while I played keyboards for Department S for the first time dressed as Boudicca/Britannia (George not me) was now conquering the world with Culture Club……U2 were well on the way to establishing themselves as the greatest indy rock band in the world, whilst on the home front bands like The Smiths and The Housemartins where playing a sort of Beatley-Punk. And of course the debut from Big Audio Dynamite had hit the turntables.
My friend John Crancher had become an up and coming name on the fashion scene and I would often be seen out with him at various clubs and gigs for which I would always wear one of his famous long tailed shirts. By this time I had left the record shop and was working at an advertising agency which in 1985 meant drinking loads of alcohol that was being paid for by someone else, it was a cracking life. I had left Fulham and for the last few years had been living in a block of flats in The Oval, in fact you get to see them and the stairwell I used to walk up every night, complete with NF graffiti, at the beginning of the Clash film Rude Boy….one of the crew was related to my flatmate. I was still meeting up with Mike and Glenn from the record shop on a regular basis….both as active members of the gay community were worried about AIDS and rumours were rife about who had it.
The Clash had really disappeared off my radar, the last time I had seen them live was in 1979 having liked Rope and Calling I didn’t love them and felt there were other bands that I wanted to invest my time in playing smaller venues which was always my preference. So when Cut The Crap finally arrived I was totally ambivalent towards it, Jones leaving was an issue to me…..but I hadn’t enjoyed his album. The cover was a real turn off and looked like a cover from a cheap punk compilation complete with obligatory Mohican punk on the cover. So I never did buy this album, first time I heard it was a few months after it came out. I am sure I must have been tainted by the negative press it got and the general distain that Bernie had set himself up as the new Mick. I remember going round to my friend Jerry Lamont’s flat near Elephant and Castle, we were talking about it and I said I hadn’t heard it so he popped on a copy he had taped from a mate and that was the first time I encountered it. I remember thinking this isn’t the Clash and that was the last time I heard it until about ten years ago when it appeared on Spotify, then got promptly deleted from the Clash discography but, I note, has recently been returned…..even if you think it’s rubbish it is still the sixth and final album.
Well the pandemonium that preceded the making of Crap didn’t bode well nor did the fact that Joe and Bernie!!! Were crafting the songs whilst they were in Germany recording
So hear goes with fresh ears………….a single album strangely full of tracks that come in at around three minutes, no short sharp or elongated….just three minutes
Side 1 : Dictator starts us off sounding a bit like something from a Stevo album, an 80’s record entrepreneur mainly famous for a compilation called Some Bizarre from which allowed most of us hear Soft Cell, The The and Blancmange for the first time, the choppy synthesizers don’t really work neither do the “Spanish speaking radio” samples which appear too high in the mix. Dirty Punk follows, quirkily this has the feel of The Alarm about it with anthemic reframes, I always felt that The Alarm had the feel of The Clash…I presume Joe must have picked up on their success in the US. The single We Are The Clash isn’t a bad song but isn’t there something naff about referencing yourself in a song, OK it worked for The Monkeys and S Club 7 however it seemed little a desperate attempt to justify the new band to the old fans. You Are Red..Y is indy synth pop, if you were into Was Not Was, Fashion or Life in Tokyo Japan then this isn’t a bad homage. Cool Under Heat takes up back to a more of a traditional Clash song but clearly lacking the driving drums of either Topper or Terry or current drummer Pete Howard who is said to be replaced with drum machine throughout this LP. Movers and Shakers falls into the same box, Clash song with out Topper, if you speed this track up a bit and threw in some angst in Joe’s vocal you would have a proper Clash offering.
Side 2 : This Is England too slow and too traditional in the sound scape, John McGeogh would have had a field day over laying guitar on top of this taking to a musical place that was both disturbing and threatening, however dull guitar and chanting chorus leaves me wanting something better. Second track is Three Card Trick a very good rock Ska song that wouldn’t be out of place on London Calling. Play To Win sounds like a Combat Rock era B Side with it’s arcade computer samples and a bit of Joe banter with Vince White doesn’t really make any sense. Fingerpoppin drives along nicely with it’s disco beat and up to the moment electro soundscape….as with everything a driving drum beat would have elevated it to be on par with Magnificent Seven and a notch or two below Casbah. Shepherd writes and sings the next track North and South a sub medium pacer where he mimics Joe’s singing style with his lighter voice, better produced and with Joe rasping away this could be a really good song, it seems to busy through out and would benefit from dropping some of the instruments out and allowing the song to breath a bit more. Life Is Wild is the third track on the album to have a football chant chorus, it’s not my favourite theme on the album but the track moves along well with something of Sham 69 to it.
I must say having listened to this record about six times in a row it is a bit of a grower. Unfortunately the only member of The Clash 1985 to actually play throughout the album, Strummer, is dead….Nick and Vince were bit part players and Paul and Pete aren’t on it at all…..otherwise my request would be to take it back into the studio, Topper to add drums, lots of the silly samples to be taken off and get a proper production job done on it……the only person who could take on this mantle is Mr Jones but I dare say he would have no interest in rescuing this memorial to The Clash without him. However as I listen to it today it’s much better than I remembered.
Obviously we have now covered all six of the bands studio output, however I couldn’t end without summarizing their body of work and maybe offering a few thoughts on the post Clash offerings in general……I will leave you now as I wonder off to High Street Kensington to get a very short back n sides from Antenna and buy myself a suit from Rock-a-cha that I can wear in the office…..till the next time
